Monday, 16 June 2014

Ask, Seek, Knock

"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened."

Matthew 7:7-8 - I have to say this has to arguably be my most favourite verse this year, and in particular in this stage of life that I am in. I've grown up reciting this verse for as long as I can remember. Mostly it was for Sunday school or for purposes of my CRE CATs and exams, but I finally took a step back to reflect on the true essence of this verse. Call it an epiphany if you will, but whatever it is, reciting that verse these days is the fuel I need to get through all my days, whether good or bad.

Ask and you shall receive, seek and you shall find, knock and the door will be opened to you is my new life mantra. I realized that so many times in life we watch opportunities pass us by because we didn't ask, seek or knock. Think about it. Really. Maybe it's that nice girl you've always wanted to ask out but you assumed things will just magically work in your favour and someone else ended up asking her out instead. Or that great idea that you had that you didn't work on and someone else ended up claiming it. Or that mentor you never reached out to, so you ended up making unnecessary mistakes in your career and wasted a lot of time in money deals gone bad. The list is endless.

I have always been a big believer in the power of asking. That's what sets you apart from average people. Average people are okay with whatever life hands them, whatever people hand them. They are never inquisitive, they never ask. Outliers know that the world owes them nothing therefore they will ask, they will seek and they will knock. And you know what, no one said that the answer always has to be yes. Be prepared for plenty of NO's, but never cease in your quest.

I once a read a book a few years back (I can't quite recall the name of the book), but I took away one thing that made me look at life differently. The author wrote that you lose nothing by asking. Worst case scenario is that you are turned down with a NO. But still, you lose NOTHING. Failure to ask, however, is a whole other spectrum. You risk losing out on a great opportunity merely by not asking. In a cost-benefit analysis kind of situation, I'd pick asking over not asking any day.

My point is, we need to embrace the power of asking and pro activeness. I can assure you my life has been so much easier since I took up that mentality. I never feel as if I'm losing out on anything even if faced with a million NO's because I know it would be much more painful to lose out on an opportunity. And that verse, Matthew 7;7-8 has been my inspiration, my fuel, my guide. It's funny how all the answers we seek all along regarding life are all in the Bible. We just have to take a step back and really read the word.

Monday, 14 April 2014

Two years on...

Wow. I can't believe it's almost been two years since I last put up a post. Well, lemme stop pretending because I originally started this blog as a class project (I got good grades in that unit BTW so the blog was a success) so really I was done with the blog when the semester was over. Anyway, I remembered that I was once a wannabe blogger and decided to go down memory lane. Oh boy what a trip that was! I've been reading through my posts back then and realized that I am actually a good writer. Not to brag, but I've always known I could write,just never knew I could express myself that well.

That trip took me back to two years ago and I realized how much I have grown through those two years. Most people think growth is mostly physical or financial. You know, you finish campus, get a good job, move to a bigger house, get a car etc... same old drill that most people go through. But the truth is, growth can involve every aspect of you as a whole. Looking back at my posts, I realized how much I've grown mentally and linguistically. I don't necessarily reason the same exact way I did two years ago, I no longer view the world, in the same exact way that I viewed it two years back either.

Change is good. Change shows that you have grown. I read a quote a few weeks back somewhere that 'everythng is temporary, but change is constant'. So true. Change is the one constant and definite thing we are all sure will happen in the course of our lives (death also). We may not necessarily know the type of change that will happen, but we always know it will happen some day. And truth is, change is scary. Getting done with school is a sort of change, getting a new job is change, getting married is change. But we more often that not ignore the simpler changes in life. Like the fact that you most probably have to drop more and more people out of your life as you grow up, or that life experiences teach you a lot and you gradually change the way you view the world. I'm always happy any time I look back and relalize how much I've changed because change indicates growth. And growth is positive. I personally think that people should aim for change every new year, instead of coming up with those bogus new year resolutions that they never live up to. See, aiming for change instead guarantees growth and I think is personally more fulfilling. Aim to constantly improve yourself and you'll always be ahead of the pack.

Tuesday, 27 November 2012

X versus Y

I was having lunch in the cafeteria sometime back with two of my friends and we happened to engage in a very interesting discussion. It was just after recess and still taking in the news that one of our fellow students had died during the Coast recess trip. This led to a whole trip down memory lane and trying to figure out how many students had died in the past two years.

A couple of our befallen comrades had taken away their own lives and this was the basis of a very heated debate. One of my friends believed that student suicides are as a result of psychological issues stemming from one's family background. The other one believed that it's a personality thing; certain personality types are more vulnerable to such extreme behaviors. I, on the other hand, was sitted on the fence. I am still sitted there.

To avoid confusion, let's name my friends X and Y. X proposed it is as a result of one's family background while Y argued that it depends on one's personality type.

X explained that an individual from a stable home with very loving parents was less likely to commit suicide. Stable home here meant that both parents were present as the person was growing up, therefore the individual has less unresolved mummy and daddy issues. This directly translates to greater mental and psychological stability thus less risk of suicidal tendencies.

Loving parents who always encourage their kids is an added advantage because this gives the kids confidence and builds their self esteem. Her argument was that people with high self esteem are highly unlikely to take such extreme measures because it's hard for them to let issues really get to them.

Y on the other hand, proposed that it all depends on your personality type. Some people are raised up in very loving and stable homes but are still sensitive to issues. She explained that some personality types like melancholics are more likely to have suicidal tendencies because of their inability to express emotions. Phlegmatics and sanguines are less likely to commit suicide because they are generally emotional people and are capable of communicating their problems.

It's still hard for me to give my two cents on the whole matter because I am a melancholic from a very stable and loving family background and I do not have suicidal tendencies.

What's your take?

Saturday, 24 November 2012

"Haki yetu"

I'm an observer. I love watching people from the sidelines. I love watching people's funny unconscious habits. It's a really nice hobby. Please don't think I'm weird, I just have a keen eye.

There's a footbridge where I live. Kenyans are funny people. 80% of the people do not use the footbridge. They'd rather waste time and energy running across the dual carriage way and jumping over waist-high metal rails than go up the footbridge. Don't forget that vehicles drive down there at 100kph speeds. Kenyans are funny people indeed.

We lost one of our fellow students a few months back through a road accident. It was sad because it was a hit and run somewhere along Mombasa road. Sometimes I wish it was possible to uproot the footbridge near my home and erect it at the Daystar Athi River junction. The students there clearly need it more than my neighbors.

The Athi students later took part in a peaceful demonstration protesting the hit and run incident while hoping to get the attention of whoever is in charge of putting up such structures. It's sad that we have to lose students to road accidents. That's just wrong.

Anyone who's been to the Thika super highway has seen the beautiful footbridges the Chinese have erected near every town and school. That's what we need at Athi. The student population there has been forgotten and the administration needs to really follow up on that matter.

Marching along city streets holding placards is not Daystar culture. Another student life cannot be lost along Momabasa road. It's time for us to speak up and stand for our rights. We need a footbridge.

Feel free to share suggestions on who we can petition or approach.

Pavlov's Dog Syndrome

I'm so happy that this week is finally over! Have you ever had one of those weeks that you wished it was possible to sleep right through the week and wake up on Friday evening instead? Yes, I was having such a week. It's a story that stretches back to one month ago but I'll simply summarize it into two words- class project. 

I have had the most stressing month of my life trying to deal with some uncooperative group members. We had one month to plan an event which happens to be the final exam in that particular unit. I'm sure you can understand my rage when some people did not seem to take this project seriously. 40% of my final grade depended on the effort of these people! To cut a  long story short, we held the event this week and it was a complete success. At the end of the day we are all still friends (even with the jokers). That is the reason I'm so happy this week is over. 

The event, however, was a big eye opener for me. We spent so much time and energy trying to put together something that was over in less than one hour. We spent so much money on food, drinks, decor and outfits because we needed to please our guests and the lecturer (for the marks of course). 

This got me thinking if society puts that much pressure on us that we feel the need to impress others or fit in anytime we undertake an activity. The problem with society is that we already have predetermined yardsticks on what we perceive as cool or 'uncool'.

You need to have a toned body, you need to drive a nice car, you need to dress in designer clothes, you need to party every weekend in the newest joints in town, you need to have a white collar job, you need, you need, you need!

The rules have already been set down for us and all we need to do is be conditioned like Pavlov's dog. This is one of the causes of student suicides in Daystar and many other places. The pressure to fit in. The pressure to impress. It's either society's way or the highway. 

It's sad to imagine that a student can take away their own life because they feel they don't 'fit in'. What happened to being your brothers keeper? What happened to loving your neighbor as you love yourself? The students that are weak at heart eventually give in to the pressure after months and months of trying to feel accepted. 

No one should be made to feel as if they don't belong. It's about time students got sensitized on this issue and society's yardsticks erased. Even the Bible states that we are all made in God's image and likeness meaning we are all equal. 

Let's all stop acting like Pavlov's dog and decide not to conform to society's set standards. Change starts from within. Set your own standards of what is 'cool' and only then shall you find true happiness and fulfillment. No other student should die because of society's pressures. Change ni mimi na wewe.